SINS: Sorry I'm Not Sorry

I am getting pretty excited about my date with NASA. Well, the girl that works at NASA. I have a new interest, and that interest may be of interest to you. Here it is, ready? Pre-Date Ultimatums. It sets the tone. Its an anchor in the water saying, hey here is where I begin, lets jump in.

Pre-Date Ultimatum for NASA:::Wear an Astronaut suit to dinner, or the date is cancelled a REAL Astronaut Suit…and by cancelled, I mean we will go Dutch when the bill comes. Then its not a date, its just two people, sharing the same table, living different lives.

I have also given myself a Pre-Date Ultimatum, for it is only fair. My predate ultimatum is to look nice. Nice shoes, jeans, button down, and Tiger face paint—-kind of like the picture above, but with more whiskers to indicate not only aggressive prowess but also timeless wisdom. Additionally, to indicate interest in her interests like your interest in my interests, I will place a solitary, yet temporary, tattoo on my left cheek. This tattoo will be of a space shuttle. At the start of the date, the shuttle will be pointed skyward filled with hopes and dreams of possibility and worlds to be discovered. If the date goes poorly, the shuttle will slowly shift (on its own) downward towards the ground, and may be accompanied by a buzzing noise commonly heard on Family Feud or Wheel of Fortune.

For the date, I think we will go to dinner and a comedy club to see an improv show. I will not be performing, so I can only imagine this is going to be a lot like being a production assistant on set for the filming of a porn. Just with a lot more clothes. Equal amount of moaning.